[FML?]

Sometimes I think the whole universe is conspiring against me! Just when I thought I could finally do this, two of my cousins walk into my life and basically ruin everything! : /
They are here for a short holiday (about 2 weeks, they will be leaving next Monday)...my diet plan has basically gone outta the window :(
I have been eating out everyday - and they opt for places where I can't even pick a decent healthy meal :(
And if I cut down on portion sizes I have to hear stuff like, "Don't bother. Weight loss isn't for people like us!" WTF???
(for the record both of them are pretty 'normal')
Ugh! I'm so bugged. I'm not even close to them. :(
Can't blog much...will post some thinspo sooon!
Love x

Pretty Thin...

Nothing much to blab about...just been working out and trying to eat 'sensibly'. :)
Lost 8lb in the past two weeks so I'm happy!! But I can't seem to fit into that shirt yet! : / Maybe it's just water weight that I've lost...? Anyway, not gonna stress about all this. Is anyone here on Pretty Thin? If you are then add me...My profile name is 'skinnyxdreams'. I don't know why I haven't mentioned this before. I log in there more frequently than here.... It's great for support and motivation! :)
See you there then.
Love x

Top 5 Favourite Celebs (Thinspo)

For this week, these are my picks

#5. Daisy Lowe

#4. Zoe Saldana

#3. Katharine McPhee

#2. Kirsten Stewart

Not crazy about Kirsten, but love her new look and she's so skinny! <3

#1. Miranda Kerr

I totallyyyyyy love Miranda Kerr here!! Love what she's wearing..she's gorgeous!

I Am Mean...

I love watching fat people on Wipeout...there I said it!
Yeah, I know, I'm fat too...but come on...it's a riot watching them going 'boink!' and then 'splat!' :P
It's not that funny when the skinny people fall....(and this also gives me motivation...I picture myself going 'boing, boing, splat!' and everyone laughing at me)... Fat people just 'fall funny'  :P
Weird?? Mean??
I guess so...but here's the only place I could 'say' it out loud!
Love x

Ps - Lost 4kgs in 10 days

How I Stop Myself from Binging

Okay...before anyone starts making assumptions, this entry is not about 'how not to eat'. These are just ways in which I stop myself from binging/eating when I'm not supposed to...(and some of it is supposed to be funny)... :) :)

* Watch 90210. Ok, I really hate the show (barring Jessica Stroup, she's just SO pretty!) but all those skinny girls on it make me realise how HUGE I really am. Goodbye appetite! :)

* Watch football. Although 'my' country is nowhere close to qualifying I've been rooting for Italy(sniff...sniff..) for over a decade...and now I have two other teams to support: Argentina & Spain (mainly b/c I LOOOVE Barcelona). So during those 90 minutes - I don't eat ANYTHING b/c I'm tooo anxious. :) I keep a bottle of water with me and keep sipping that every few minutes. Funny thing is, I just noticed this trend a couple of days back (damn!)...now I'm gonna watch each and every single match: including all the league ones.

* Play Left 4 Dead 2. This one's pretty straightforward. If both my hand are busy, I can't eat. :)

* Play with my pup. Everytime I get a craving I pick up the ball and play fetch with the pup. (Now he keeps bringing the ball over every few minutes..aww ) :)

* Have pictures of skinny girls every where possible: Desktop wallpaper, screen-saver, cell phone background, in my journal...and I keep changing them often...

* Make random lists (such as this) to take my mind of food.

Ok, that's all for now :)
Love x

Results!! Well Almost...

I'm super excited!! Finally beginning to see results!! :) :)
But I still have a little bit to go...will post as soon as I have reached it!! :)
Right now I'm concentrating on staying active and controlling my portions...
My day usually goes like this:
1. Wake up, breakfast: Special K + Skimmed Milk
2. Lunch - boiled veggies (a small bowl) w/ lemon juice & olive oil
3. Soup (probably a toast)
(If i get hungry in the middle I either have a few carrot or cucumber slices)
Plus:
1. A hour in the gym doing cardio + strength training
2. Walk with my dog for an hour

Yeah, it's kind crazy for me and keeps me on my toes... but I'm so excited about this. I have been following this for a week. And the thing is, if I feel like having a chocolate, I don't deny myself that. I go ahead and buy a tiny piece - so that's really working b/c I don't get tempted by these 'forbidden' food items
Anywhooooo....more sooon!
Love x

Another Day

I always think my life will be perfect once I'm thin (again). I remember the days when I used to be thin - I wouldn't mind going shopping with my friends, I had tons of confidence...I was HAPPY. And that's what I want back mainly. I want to go out with my friends and not feel like the fattest girl on this planet...I wanna try out all sorts of clothes and feel great in them... some people say it's all in your head and you should feel confident about yourself no matter what size you are. Hell, that doesn't work for me. Not one bit.
So here I am, once again. I really want things to work out...Somehow I feel I'll be better at my job if I'm thinner. Feel my life will begin to improve. Even if it doesn't - at least I'll be thin. And that's reason enough to be happy..

I sort of went off track and ate a few (three) cookies last night...staying up and watching football always makes me hungry. But I guess three is better than finishing off an entire packet...hmmmm....

Okay, that's all from me. x

Progress (sort of)

I was supposed to fit into this shirt by the end of last week...but it still is a bit snug. I can button it up but I can't wear it anywhere outside because it obviously still a little small. Sigh. But I guess even that's progress.
I haven't been able to get to the gym as frequently as I'd planned but I guess even three days at the gym is better than nothing at all. My squash partner is on vacation so I haven't played in over a week (it really is a bore playing by yourself). :(
In August, I'll be heading 'home' for a short while. I hate visiting my extended family. The only thing they talk about is my weight...and right in front of me, like I'm not even there!!! No one bothers to ask how I'm doing...or about my job...or my future plans...ugh! I hate (some) of them.

So I really want to drop down to a size 12 before I meet them. At least they'll get off my back and I can have a nice time (by myself). So yeah, I'm really bugged about that!

Another thing that really annoyed me was this article in Marie Claire: I Married A Total Stranger

Once you've read it, and if you're Indian/Asian/whatever, you'll know what I mean. This woman's clearly written this keeping a particular demographic in mind. What a bunch of crap! I'm really disappointed with Marie Claire. Tsk!

Anyway, that's all for now. Love x

*Edit* The article per se is kind of old. But wth!

Bootayyyy

I wrote that just because it's stuck in my head, I don't know why :P
Anyway, moving on - this week went pretty well. I know I was supposed to write down everything I wrote down but I couldn't even find time to log in and blog about it. Nonetheless, I'm pretty happy with the progress diet-wise.
I could've worked out a bit more but I guess even a little bit's better than nothing at all. :) Tomorrow I'm planning to play squash with a friend. The game's addictive :)
Ohh, this reminds me, I have to but some new workout clothes! AND there's a HUGE office party next week, so I have to buy a nice outfit for that! aaagh! I soooo wish I were THIN!!! Ugh! Ugh! I really want to look nice for a change! :(

Anyway, I think I'll make a list of things to do by the end of this weekend (i.e. Friday):

1. Buy some workout clothes. At least a couple of sweatpants and a few tees.
2. Buy nice outfit for office party
3. Lose 80lbs by next week :P k - but at least 5lbs...hmmm...
4. Practice Spanish verbs
5. Start writing my SOP

Alright, that's all for now...Besos x

Thinspo

I think it's safe to say that summer's finally here! :) And what better way to get some motivation than some awesome thinspo! :) :)










*Totally adore what this girl's wearing*











Don't have too many on my comp right now, so will upload more later.
As far as progress goes, right now I think I am a size 16 already b/c I wear size 16 jeans (River Island) but it changes from store to store. So I'll be sticking to only one store to keep track of my weight-loss. I don't fit into size 16s from H&M - so that's my target at the moment :) I own a shirt that's size 16 and can't button it up (anymore) :P So have to fit into that within two weeks *fingers crossed*

Time's time to head to the gym now. Love x

(Ps - The sizes mentioned at UK sizes)

Back In Action

Ok my absence was intentional. My holiday plans got cancelled so I made new ones and those got cancelled too (thank you volcano)...so I decided to just take a 'mental' holiday...didn't work for a week...just played Gears of War & Tekken 6...read some amazing books - and started playing squash! I'm in love with the game :)
Although weight-loss has been at the back of my mind, I knew it was time to get some perspective and new motivation. So right now I'm just gonna focus on working out (yes, I renewed my gym subscription and have been going religiously) and just making my lifestyle more 'active'. Oh yeah, although I'm not gonna strictly count calories, I've started to write down what I eat and shall be putting it up here. :)
And yeah, I'm not giving up thinspo - I loveeeee those pictures - so I'll definitely be putting up more pics from now on.
My next weigh in - a week from now.
Love x

Exercise and an Engagement

The past 10 days, a friend and I have been going on these super long walks every evening (with my pup of course). We walk and walk till we are exhausted and then walk some more :)
So in the morning, I do some mat exercises (especially for my knee) and in the evening its these walks. I will be renewing my gym membership the end of this month (after I get my salary). So I'm really hoping to see some great results by the end of March!
For now though, I'm not concentrating on weight loss - because, to be really honest, it sometimes gets really depressing. :)
My current target is to fit into an old pair of jeans (they are about 2 years old). I want to fit into them before my trip to China. I'm positive I'm gonna be the fattest person everywhere I go! Haha! Sometimes I feel like cancelling the whole thing.

Anyway, that's that. *fingers crossed* :)

Last week a friend of mine got engaged :) And I'm super excited!! She is supposed to get married in December. Totally looking forward to the wedding! And she's south Asian - so that means an entire week of celebration!!!! Yay! Although I'm part South Asian, I've only been to a couple of weddings *sigh*

I'm also looking forward to getting some 'ethnic' outfits stitched. It's all gonna be colourful and like those Bollywood musicals (I hope) :D

Some photos from Flickr, thought I'd share :)










The one below is a Bengali Wedding - The male members from the Bride's side life her up hiiiiigh so that the groom cannot put the garland around her neck ;) I've seen this in one of my cousin's wedding! It's sooo much fun!

Happy!

I can finally cross out my first target!!!!! Yay!!!
As of yesterday, I weigh 178.5lb - SO happy! :)
To be honest, I thought I'd be here earlier, but I'm not going to dwell on all that now...the past week, I have been moderately working out (at home) and will start going to the gym once I get back from my trip.
I'm kind of getting addicted to the scales now, hehe, I checked my weight twice today.. and I haven't been eating much either...I think I'm going back to my old habits. Which isn't good, look where it's got me (after I lose the weight, I put it back on SO easily)...So I'm just going to eat like a 'normal' human being. Nothing more, nothing less. I can feel the difference already...I'm somehow happier, my clothes don't feel as snug...I hope I can stick to this permanently.
I just get so complacent, once I start losing the weight, I'm like, "ohhh this is so easssyyyy! I can indulge a little"...and I start eating all the wrong things...sigh

Anywayyyyyyyyy, like I said, no dwelling on bad stuff :)
Hope I can begin blogging regularly like before... :)

Love x

Day 2 (sort of)

Went for a nice long walk last evening..the weather was nice (for a change) and Pup was in a good mood and didn't pull on the leash too much (and before you start, I spent days and hours getting him to walk properly and have given up now - he's not that bad) :)
Today, I'm planning to work out for at least an hour + go on a walk.
I don't know where my motivation's gone.. :(

Anyway, will post later today!
Love x

If I Could Save Time In A Bottle...

Wow, okay. I have really missed this whole blogging thing. And I guess it will take sometime to get back on track, but I'm in a good mood, so I won't complain.
First, weightloss - I managed to cross my first target and had dropped down to 178.5lb (woot!). Unfortunately that was that...a couple of my friends came down from the US and all we did was drink, eat, party, drink some more - and I'd end up skipping meals and eating the 'wrong' stuff (McD's - eeex!!) - - I'm scared to weight myself right now. I don't even know how much I've gained back!!!
So I'm giving myself until the end of this month (again). Ha ha.

Also, my trip! Yay! I'll be leaving in April - for two weeks. Can't wait to meet my friends there! So excited!! The only thing I'm bummed about is, I can't shop there :(
You really have to be 'skinny' to fit into the clothes out there..maybe in Hong Kong I might find something...but I'm not pinning any hopes on that. I need to drop like 50lb in 5 weeks. *sigh*
I'm beginning to hate myself again.

Alright, for now, this is it.

Love to all!! x

China :)

I know it's been ages since I posted, but work's been super hectic! Also a few friends had come down to visit and I didn't have much 'me' time :)
Anyway, I'm super excited about my trip - I'm going to Chinaaaaaaaaa! :)
I have to drop down to 170lb by then!!! :)
More later!!!!!!!!!

Break

I haven't logged in sometime...just trying to turn my life around a little bit.
Actually, to be totally honest, I've been thinking of ways to get out of this place :)
And if things work out, then I'll be out of here by 2011. Haha! I know, it sounds like such a long, long time but things take time...
I'm working on a proposal - want it to be really great :) So of course, researching all this will take time :)

Anyway...I haven't been to the gym in over 4 days. Will definitely be going today.
I haven't eaten anything 'bad' - but I did have some chocolate (Kit Kat Chunky) and have been drinking like a fish the past week :P

Time to stop all that and start again!

Love x

Giant Post - Skinny Jeans

Confrontation…I hate them. Last night was the worst ever! We argued for over 4 hours over the phone…No one’s ever said such hurtful things to me before…needless to say I’ve completely removed him from my life. No more drama! I don’t need him and certainly don’t want him.

I’m better off concentrating on better things. Dug up some thinspo from my computer. I didn’t realise I had SO many! :) This time I decided to follow a theme. It’s ‘Skinny Jeans’ – it’s mainly because I love them! And I can’t wait to lose some weight so I can wear them! :)

“I don’t own any of these pictures. They are all off the internet. So if you want me to remove anything please email me.”






Gosh, I totally love this girl’s body! Perfection!
















Hmmm, I just noticed, doesn’t the word ‘Adidas’ on the bag look weird. Almost as if it’s been photoshopped…heh..anyway, I love her legs!





























































































































Feel free to let me know what you liked or didn’t like!!
Love x